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hellboy is a hell no

I loved Hellboy. Any movie that uses Hitler's obsession with the occult as a basis for a questionable plot line is a movie that I HEART! (and it had demons to boot!) and it was funny.

So when I heard that "Hellboy II" was coming out, I was excited. until I actually watched it.


that's right.. awwwww...

I mean, the acting was pretty good. The dude playing the evil elf prince (hahahaha!) was really good (Luke Goss, I've never heard of you, but you were good!). The special effects were excellent... and yet, I would have to say this is probably where things went wrong. There is something to be said for ingenuity.. you know, when you can't afford all the fancy schmancy CGI, so you do something else. You make your asteroids out of potatoes, you stuff a bunch of little people into teddy bear outfits, and you hire Frank Oz to give the best puppet performance ever... then, years later, when you get rich and famous.. you go back and fuck it ALL UP!

alright.. back to Hellboy then: having less wunder-effects means your drama rests more solidly on your actors' shoulders instead of the CGI, and your movie becomes more about the problems of people (if people = demons, trolls, elves, fairies) instead of an alien party fest that was better done by "Men in Black".

or as my sister says, "Speed Racer was better". yeah... yeah it was.


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