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the little things

when I'm sitting at my desk at work, I like to think of all the other things I could be doing. after 5 months of unemployment, I don't fantasize about sleeping on the beach anymore. I think about being useful.

being useful usually means you have a role, which I don't seem to have at the moment = use-less. which probably means that all this time i've spent meditating on the nature of attatchment has been less effective than i've hoped. otherwise I wouldn't be so angry when I get out of work every day.

ironically, I'm making more money than I ever have in my life. so I've effectively succeeded in some capitalist dream. so I guess I better purchase a better attitude.

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